What If Dating is Dead For Women Professionals?
by Max Wright
The advent of speed dating and match making services shows how tired we are of trying to find a soul mate by dating. Busy women who are invested in a rewarding professional career are particularly frustrated with the waste of time and effort associated with the “cast a wide net” approach to dating. I finally met my soul mate and got married when I ditched dating for the worn-out thing it is and pursued a different course.
Stop looking for quality mates in low quality places. The night life and bar scene isn’t the place to find the man of your dreams who wants to have a loving, long term relationship. Look in places where quality people invest their time. Do you like athletics? Start getting involved with running, cycling, swimming, or tennis clubs to name a few. Are you religious? Start going to church and looking for great men (that’s where I found my beautiful wife 13 years ago).
You’re likely to find a man who shares your interests if you do this, and it will be EASY to find common ground, you’ll start by doing what you both enjoy then let it naturally branch out to other areas of life. I met my wife at church and we started running together – 13 years later we’re still going to church together but now we play tennis or bike (kids and running injuries made us shift gears) but we’re still active together.
I was deliberate with my relationship. It may sound old fashioned but I started the relationship because I wanted to find an amazing wife, not have fun with a girlfriend. I pursued my wife to see if she was a good fit for me and vice-versa. It took us six months to answer that question and get married. Know what you must have in a relationship and what you can’t tolerate in a relationship. If you know this before you get involved, it will make it easy to determine if it is a good fit. Do not waste your time in relationships that are not good fits – it’s nearly impossible to change people, people change on their own. Love them or leave them for who they are, not for who you want them to be.
Respect yourself enough to save your love for your future husband. Don’t give away your physical affection to men who don’t love you enough to marry you. Getting physical will blur your judgment and his, and you won’t be able to make a good decision. You’ll be able to grow your physical relationship just fine after you’re married. Don’t worry, you can work through any issues if you are committed and in a loving relationship.
I hope your you are able to see some good first date tips based on what we’ve talked about. Remember, whatever you do, don’t be boring on a first date!
Jonathan is a student of the relationship between men and women. See his thoughts at http://www.igirlgetsring.com/category/dating-tips/ and first date tips at http://www.igirlgetsring.com/first-date-tip-dont-boring/ which is his blog.