Tag Archives: trust

Building Trust Again

Trust, a key component in any relationship, faces many challenges. Almost no relationship is not tested in the area of trust. When they occur, couples may look back and say they did nothing wrong and do not deserve this. Understanding the myriad of reasons for broken trust, the key steps to rebuilding trust and the benefits of a restored trust makes the process before a couple clear.

Reasons of Broken Trust

A variety of things attack trust. While it would be nice to think couples only need to defend one area of their relationship in a single way, the relational foundation gets destroyed by fire, flood and neglect. Let’s look at how these reasons rear their heads before addressing how to repair them.

Betrayal: Hearing betrayal, thoughts turn to matters of emotional or physical infidelity. It is a clear break of trust which should never be ignored. However, minimizing the other forms opens couples to numerous other issues. One might hide things to keep their heart safe. Perhaps they keep a secret account just in case. This betrayal burns away a storehouse of trust as any physical relationship.

General Disagreements: An erosion of trust occurs when someone continually disagrees or expresses things contrary to how they once did without any explanation. Think of this as when a river digs the earth out from under a tree on the bank exposing the roots. A partner may feel unsafe as though they need to keep certain things to themselves. This dark, dank environment does not foster an environment of trust.

Time: Neglect of trust weaken the foundation like an old covered bridge with missing boards and gaps in the roof. One is more likely to stay on their side rather than reaching out to the other person. Trust needs feeding and care from both people to keep it strong, vibrant and growing.

Key Steps to Rebuilding Trust

These points will sound simple. Often when facing the task of repairing trust, the process in more labor and time intensive than simple maintenance would have been. Take each step at face value while realizing layer exist underneath making the it important to press forward when times get tough.

* Express: Sharing thoughts and feeling become critical. A partner needs to see, hear and understand what is going on. Take time to investigate these things yourself and then share what is found there.

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* Listen and Gain Insight: Monopolizing the expression phase never builds trust. Because it is a two way street, one must listen to understand what a partner is experiencing from their side. Be quiet and still.

* Give Time and Space: Resist the urge to respond in the moment, especially to negative feedback. The first pass is often defensive and needs to be digested. Avoid rushing toward resolution as this short circuits the true growth of trust.

* Table Big Things and Circle Back: Not everything will be resolved on the first pass. If something huge comes up, acknowledge its existence, promise to return to it and then fulfill the agreement. Promises prove critical and can not be broken.

Benefits of a Trust Repaired

No one would ever say the process to repair trust would be wonderful. Several relationships never face the hard work of rebuilding. They are surrendered to the pile of broken commitments. However, every relationship needs tweaking of their trust which means there is a benefit to the act.

Stronger: A tempered sword stands against the clashing blow. A relationship, similarly forged through the fires of rebuilt trust, remains strong as outside forces attempt to beat it. Trust will give a solid spine to the relationship moving forward.

Safer: Developing a place where each party knows they can be heard allows for them to grow. With the trust of the other, a partner could take a risk because they know the net of love and trust exist to catch them when they fall.

Deeper: From a place of trust, couples love far deeper. They have set aside some of the fears they have about where they stand and who they stand with. They can encourage more and take greater risks with their own hearts.
Trust is both delicate and strong. No relationship survives for long without it. Maintaining trust can be easy and hard simultaneously. Most people rarely think far ahead to stay out of trouble where trust is concerned. This is why taking the time, care and love to rebuild what matters the most will allow couples to stand the test time.

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Reestablishing Trust in the Relationship

Trust can be the strongest element in a relationship. It is a barrier against the challenges presented by the outside world seeking to destroy a couple. What happens when trust is damaged? Can it be shored up or even reconstructed? The short answer is yes. The longer answer centers around the difficult process requiring honesty, open communication and diligence in forging a trusting bond. One needs to walk the hard path to get back to where they belong.

Speaking the Truth

Trust lives in an environment of honesty. Regardless of how good or bad a relationship ended, each person needs to be truthful about everything. Honesty should not be used as a club to bend the other person to the will of the other. The past, present and future depends on being careful and using important keys to build trust.


* Accurately Address Things: Couching things or overly editing clouds the message.

* Watch How the Message Is Delivered: Tone conveys a great deal when speaking. Being too soft or stern may blunt or heighten what is being said unnecessarily.

* Always Be Kind: Remember the goal is to rebuild trust. A firm message offered with polite words allows for ongoing communication.

Allow a Response

Initially, it can be easy to get too focused on one’s role in the exchange. This is a two way street. One of the hardest things anyone may face targets the reply from the other person.

* Be Quiet: Hopefully, they listened thoughtfully to what was said. They deserve the same respect. Hearing back may require swallowing bitter aspects of one’s own personality or behavior.

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* Don’t Defend: Everyone, especially when receiving personal information, tends to want to leap into defense mode. Trust often needs space and acceptance. If offered with similar kindness, one must avoid the urge to choke off the exchange.

* Mirror the Behavior: During the conversation, make an effort to feel how things are going and respond accordingly. A strong sense of control, which may mask hidden defensiveness, might urge one to rush things along or pull back. One can be thoughtful without hiding behind a mask.
Make Contact

Emotional contact with one’s partner fosters an environment of trust. Treading carefully at the beginning presents a greater level of comfort. Small things like eye contact and non verbal cues will help one’s partner witness the importance and investment to growing trust. As with all things when building trust, moving too fast will likely shatter progress, so avoid being overly physical.

Consistency Proves Key

Trust cannot be built in a single conversation or afternoon. Returning to a place where the relationship returns to a healthy place requires slow, steady growth. This means making time for one another, not pushing too deep or lashing out when things get hard. The level of difficulty can feel overwhelming. One needs to acknowledge and accept what these emotions without letting the damage the conversation.

As fragile as a snowflake, one must treat trust with the respect it deserves. A relationship never survives without it, so it is up to both parties to maintain trust for the life of the relationship. Trust thrives with open communication, mutual respect and consistent contact. Pour in those and watch the trust flourish.

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Did Trust Issues Drive Your Ex Away?

Trust issues are important in relationships today.

Sometimes, it’s past experience that shapes you. But, it doesn’t matter how much someone loves you, there are going to be problems if you can’t extend a little trust to the other person in your relationship — at least until your partner has given you a reason to distrust.


I should add that valid reasons to distrust your partner do not include:
* Talking to members of the opposite sex
* Going to work with other people
* Picking up the kids after school and talking, even smiling, with other parents
* Receiving late-night phone calls from work (some jobs actually require this)
* Being kind to the wait staff at your favorite restaurants
* Smiling and talking to other people at parties
Essentially, being a cordial friendly human being is not grounds for distrust.

The story, however, is a little different if your ex had a history of telling tall tales or stepping out on you. Otherwise, it’s good form to allow the person you’re sharing your heart with a little bit of your trust unless or until said person gives you reason not to trust.


If you’re one of the millions out there who has been hurt by a cheating partner, spouse, etc. then it’s hard to open up and allow yourself to trust. Some people, though, have never witnessed what a genuine, loving, and trusting relationship looks like. You don’t have an example of how to trust or even how to behave when you do trust someone. But, that lack of trust could easily be ruining your relationship if you don’t get it under control fast.

Why does is Have Such a Negative Impact?

The truth of the matter is that trust is as essential to successful relationships as love. Your partner feels a lot of negative emotions when he or she isn’t trusted. The crux of the situation is that distrust leaves your partner feeling:
* Unloved
* Unappreciated
* Unwanted
* Disrespected
* Unmotivated to make it work

The bottom line is that it makes your partner feel bad about the relationship. That’s the last thing you want and it may be part of the reason the relationship ended.

The good news for you is that it’s not too late to turn things around. Chances are good that your ex still has strong feelings for you. Now is your chance to redeem your past, open up your heart, and put a little trust in your ex. The trick though, is in getting your ex to see how much you’ve changed. Let me help you change your stripes in a way that will really make an impression with your ex so you can get your ex back and stop the hurting for both of you.

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Can you Trust a Cheater

If you have ever been cheated on you know the emotional trauma that comes with it. Infidelity is one of the few mistakes in a relationship that is powerful enough to feel on a physical level. It is almost as if someone hit you in the gut with a big fist of disbelief.

Trust is a precious thing that you should treat with the utmost caution.

It’s kind of like the Humpty Dumpty of bonds in a relationship. People tend to toss it around without realizing how fragile it really is.

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Once it breaks they realize how impossible it seems to be to put it back together. Make sure you only give your trust away to people you can rely on. If the person you want to give your trust to has already violated it once, don’t hand it right back to them without making sure they will respect it.

So if someone is a cheater, will they always be one you cant trust?

It would be nice if there was a clear answer to this question. Unfortunately every person in the world is different. Some can change and commit themselves faithfully while others will eventually fall back into betrayal.

Don’t let a simple apology and a seemingly sincere promise persuade you into taking someone back. There are things you can do to find out whether or not someone is capable of being trusted a second time.

The first and most important thing is to determine the reason your partner cheated in the first place. People cheat for a variety of reasons, some of which are clear indicators that it may happen again.

1. Lack Of Respect

– Some people could care less about their partner’s feelings or the commitment they shared. Did your partner cheat simply because they didn’t respect you? Chances are if they cheated and show no remorse, they will continue to be unfaithful.

2. They Were Getting Little Attention

– Sometimes when people aren’t faithful to their partner it is because they want to get noticed. If someone is neglected for long enough, they might take drastic action to make things change. Many people end up finding out they played a major role in why their partner cheated.


3. The Relationship Was Getting Boring

– A lot of affairs take place just for the thrill factor. When a relationship gets boring and dull, people tend to look for excitement.

If you experienced a lack of intimacy and not enough positive interaction there is a good chance this is why your partner cheated.

These are just a few common reasons people cheat.

It could be a lot more complicated and difficult to figure out for certain couples. Once you have the motives figured out you have to ask yourself one question: Can you change the reason? The answer to this question is the easiest way to determine whether or not more cheating could be in your future with this partner.

If you can’t work together as a couple to fix the problem you are out of luck. As long as the problem persists you are bound to experience the same consequences.

There are a lot of people who foolishly think the problem will solve itself and end up falling into a reckless pattern of emotional discourse.

If you can work together to make changes there is hope, but it doesn’t guarantee they will change. Proceed with caution before giving your trust back. Take things slow and pay great attention to the way your relationship is building back up.

Even if you feel comfortable with them again and think you can trust them-

-you need to be positive they have earned your trust. Before you decide whether or not to give your trust back to someone, think about how you felt when you were betrayed.

It isn’t something people like to remember, but it is important to know that it could happen again if they aren’t careful enough.
Sadly, the majority of relationships that ended because of a cheating partner are bound to fail. If the bond is strong enough however, there is no reason you can’t work through it and find your way back to a happy couple again.

Read more about how to solve relationship problems from the man that have helped over 51 000 people to make up instead of break up at this link: The Magic Of Making Up

How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship

Trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if it’s broken but you will still see the cracks in the reflection.

Seeing past those cracks requires a lot of effort from both parties involved. Here are a few tips to help rebuild trust after instances of infidelity or when picking up the pieces after a divorce.


When someone betrays you, you go through the five stages of grief, these are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and finally, acceptance. Don’t try to fight any of these stages and don’t let any of them consume you. Believing that each stage will come to pass is what will keep you from doing something foolish. If you feel that you are not able to handle any of the stages of grief then seek professional help.


Before efforts to rebuild trust in a relationship are undertaken, both parties must be committed to rebuilding the trust in the relationship. Trust is a two way street, you are either both in or not. Rebuilding trust is not an easy feat, it takes real effort from both parties and will only be successful if you are both fully committed to making it work.


Be an open book.

Trust is earned; earning it back after losing it in the first place means can only happen if you are open. Do not give your partner any reason to doubt you. Do not use cryptic language to explain what you were doing, where you are going or whom you were with. Most importantly, expect the same from your spouse. Share passwords, explain yourself in detail and always be accountable for everything you do or say. This way there will be no gray areas in your relationship and you will have no reason to doubt each other.

Put in the time and effort.

If you are the betrayer, you need to first give your spouse the time and space to vent. This may involve some furniture throwing, hurling of insults or passive aggressive action. Whatever they do, take it because you probably deserve it. Next, you need to find out what your partner needs. Is it some level of reassurance, closure or explanation? Find out whatever it is you need to do to make things better. Basically, you need to be consistently available for your partner to respond, comfort and reassure them. If you are the victim, you need to accept what has happened and not wallow in self-pity or over indulge in playing the victim. Consciously choose to look for a solution rather than finding ways to torment yourself and others.

Knowing when to quit.

The most important thing about rebuilding trust in a relationship is trusting yourself and knowing when to abandon ship. This type of decision can only be made when you trust yourself first. Trusting your judgment means knowing your limits and how much you can take before throwing in the tools and moving on with your life.

Broken trust does not necessarily have to result in a divorce or breakup. It is possible to build a stronger and more trusting relationship if both parties are committed to making their relationship work.

The Secret you need to know to get your lover back! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!

Trusting Again Means Trusting Yourself First


If someone has betrayed your trust, you may think the concept of trusting again is out of reach. Trust is one of those things that must be earned.

Therefore, when it’s misplaced, it’s easy to simply put up a wall between you and the rest of the world to avoid it from ever happening again. Don’t live a lonely dissatisfying life without a valuable relationship due to a breach of trust.

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You can move beyond the pain of broken trust. Just because one person betrayed you, doesn’t mean everyone else will too. Trusting again means gaining the confidence that everything will work out for the best, or even better than before.

Two Kinds of Trust

Basically, there are two kinds of trust.

– Trusting Yourself
Trusting yourself means having the self-belief that all your decisions are based on kindness, love, and respect towards yourself.

– Trusting Others
Having faith and trust in others means believing that their choices in life are based on the kindness, love, and respect they have towards you. It’s harder to trust others if you don’t trust yourself first.

Be Kind and Loving to Yourself

You may think you have lost the ability to trust. But is that actually true? When you give your order at your favorite restaurant, don’t you trust they will bring the food to you? Even though there’s big trust and small trust, trust is still trust.

What you really want is to believe and relax in the fact that you won’t get hurt again. That takes trust. Focus on the positive aspects of people to bring out the positive in them. This will restore your confidence in others and bring back the trust factor.

You are Perfect Just the Way You Are

Contrary to what anyone says, you are a perfect and wholesome human being just the way you are. How do I know that? Because we all are. And the only reason you may feel like you are less than perfect is because you are not letting it naturally shine through, but it is definitely there.

Lovely view for lovers trusting each other.
Trusting and loving each other

No one has the power to take anything away from you – including trust. You can never be “less” without a certain person’s love, approval, and trust since you are “whole” in your natural state.

Encourage the Possibilities for Trusting.

Trust is an essential element to all human relations. You can’t start a new relationship if you truly believe that once someone betrays your trust, trust is gone forever.

You simply cannot live in a past relationship and expect your new one to succeed. If you are still harboring feelings of resentment due to a betrayal, your new partner will feel it and likewise not trust you.

How is this moving forward? It’s time to start trusting again and be happy.

Look for people worth Trusting.

Trusting again means actively looking for trust and kindness in others. What does your gut feeling (intuition) tell you about this person?

If you are on the fence whether or not you should trust someone, watch and observe how they treat other people.

Keep in mind you can’t judge a book by its cover. Some of the most attractive people by all appearances have the ugliest behavior behind closed doors.

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If you are in a new relationship, don’t give your heart away too fast. Start small and see where it goes. Even the smallest breach of trust is a red flag. This new person must earn both your trust and respect.

Generally, if someone is trustworthy with the little things in life, it’s a good indicator you can trust them with the big things as well.

Believe that you deserve a trusting and long-lasting relationship and you will increase your chances of manifesting it. Remember, what you think about comes about. Trusting again – you can do it.

The Secret you need to know to get your lover back! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!