Date night can be a highly effective tool for putting a little love back into your relationship. Whether you’re going through a bit of a seven-year-itch or on the verge of calling it quits, making the right date night choices can be a huge win for your marriage. Unfortunately, making date night mistakes of monumental proportions, such as those listed below, can spell disaster for your efforts to save your relationship.
Spending the Entire Night Discussing Family Problems
Date night is all about getting away from the mundane issues troubling the two of you. It’s time to turn your focus on each other. Leave the kids, parents, in-laws, and outlaws at home where they belong. You want this to be a genuine “feel good” opportunity. Don’t squander it by bringing bad vibes into the evening.
Bringing Work Along on Your Date
Whether it is in thoughts or in deeds, bringing work on your date night date not only kills the mood, but also breeds resentment. In many marriages, constant work is a problem. Your spouse feels slighted because you always seem to put work before family. When you bring work on your date night that resentment becomes a deep and simmering rage. It’s just another nail in the coffin of your relationship in many ways and one that can be easily avoided one night a week.
Cancelling Date Night or Rearranging it at the Last Minute
Cancelling date nights is a huge no-no. It’s the last thing you want to do without a darned good (I mean someone has died or is about to die kind of) reason. Whenever you cancel date night, you’re essentially putting whatever reason it was before your marriage. Stuff happens. Sitters quit or cancel and you’re left scrambling to find a suitable alternative. It’s better to do a little additional scrambling than to deal with the romantic and relationship fallout of a cancellation.
The same holds true with rearranging plans at the last minute. Once the sitter is lined up and dinner plans are set for the evening, last-minute rearrangements really upset the apple cart doing more harm for the date night cause than good. The bottom line is that if you aren’t going to take date night seriously, it’s better nto to plan to have it at all.
Falling into a Date Night Rut
Whatever you do, don’t do the same thing week after week. It becomes monotonous and routine. This is your opportunity to add a little fun and excitement to your relationship. Don’t risk it by going to dinner and a movie week after week. Switch it up some and see what a difference it makes not only in your excitement about having a date night but also in your partner’s response to date night. Make a date night “bucket list” of things you’d like to do on date night together and have fun granting each other’s date night wishes.
Date night can be as exciting or as humdrum as you allow it to be. Make a compact with yourself and one another not to let your date night become a run of the mill experience that’s easily taken for granted. Do this and your marriage is sure to be one in which you do not take each other for granted either.
While movies are not always the perfect date night choice, sometimes, when life is hectic, the DVD player and take-out from your favorite restaurant hits the spot quite nicely. Of course, you have to have the right date night movies to set the proper tone. Rather than going out and getting the latest Redbox blockbuster, consider these old standards instead.
What movie offers more for a date night movie fest. Seduction. Intrigue. Scandal. It’s all in there and more. The acting is superb. The film is engrossing. The time period is far removed from the every day. It’s a great escape film the two of you can enjoy together – time and time again if necessary.
You’ll have a hard time finding a better date night movie than one that will have her literally jumping into your lap. This film has all that and more. Adrenaline is a standard while watching the film that is well acted and features characters that are engrossing to say the least. After the film is over you can have a lot of fun staying up all night together because, really, who can sleep after watching that?
Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie. Need anyone say more? This movie is filled with twists, turns, and misdirection. Once you know how the story ends, it’s worth going back and watching again to look for hints and clues. Great date night fun for a film that’s hard to grow tired of.
This one is a “bring the box of Kleenex” film. While the story itself isn’t sad, it is, at the very least poignant. This makes it a sure hit with ladies for date night and the combination of Sandra Bullock and football make it a great choice for the guys as well. The fact that it’s based on a true story makes it all the more touching and a great night to have her feeling emotional and romantic.
Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Another great Angelina Jolie flick, this one also stars Brad Pitt. The movie itself is action packed and full of not-so-passive aggression. If only all couples could work out their marital difficulties so easily. It certainly will help you both appreciate the normalcy of your lives together.
Date night will never be a complete and total dud if you load up your DVD with any one of these great date night movie. Just remember that the purpose of date night is to spend time together so choose movies you’re both likely to have at least some interest in watching.
Ps. Some words from the man that has helped over 50 000 people from 77 countries to get love back into their lifes:
“…and what I discovered was that MANY wanted more than anything else
was a way to MAKE UP before the relationship completely broke up
forever. Secondarily, they wanted a way to deal with the emotions they
were having going through this very tough time”.
Thats why he created
In the beginning, most couples have no trouble to sticking with a weekly date night. It’s a great way to go out and do fun stuff together — as a couple. It’s time to get out of the house and break the routine a bit. However, time marches on. Children come into the picture. Budgets get strained. Economies tumble. The weekly ritual of date night takes a backseat to diaper duty, PTA meetings, and extra shifts at work. Then the marriage starts to crumble bit by bit. Is all this really the result of no longer having date night? It could be. Date night is more important than many couples realize on the surface. But why is it so important?
We live in an amazingly connected world. We have laptops, mobile phones, tablet devices, instant messages, Facebook status reports, Twitter feeds and countless other methods to stay connected on-the-go. With all that connectivity, the human connection often gets lost in the mix. People ignore the person sitting across the room in order to connect with someone thousands of miles away they haven’t seen in fifteen years. Date night, takes all that away and leaves the two of you alone to connect with one another — no matter what else is going on in your worlds.
Date night is about being alone together. More importantly, it’s about going out, away from the house (and the responsibilities that live in that house) and spending time together as lovers. It’s a change to hold hands, to have adult conversations, and to, dare I say it, FLIRT with one another. It’s time to be man and woman rather than MOM and DAD. It’s important because it helps you remember why the two of you fell in love in the first place.
One of the most important things you need to do, for the sake of your marriage, is make time for each other. In putting your family first, which is an admirable quality in any family, it’s very important to remember that your spouse is your family too. He or she needs your time just as much as each and every one of your children. Date night, gives you one night, out of seven, to spend time together. It shouldn’t be too much to ask — no matter how busy your lives become.
If you really want to maximize the effectiveness of date night, avoid topics of conversation involving school, work, family, and calendars — unless you’re discussing an upcoming romantic getaway that you’re both excited about. Date night is your opportunity to rev up the romance engine in your relationship. Don’t take it for granted.