In the first few days, even weeks, after your breakup, the only thing you can think about is how to get your lover back. It’s understandable. Depending on how long the two of you were together, you’ve shared a lot of life. It’s hard to just walk away and pretend it never happened.
The odds are good that your lover isn’t walking off unaffected either. The only real difference is that your lover has been thinking about this for a while. People don’t walk away from long-term-relationships on a whim. In other words, your ex has had a little more time to deal with the emotional side of the decision than you have.
If you’re struggling to decide if the right choice is to walk away or fight to get your lover back, these questions should help you decide.
Is the Love Still There?
This is a huge question you need to know the answer to before you make a single step to try and win your lover back. While you can only guess about how your ex really feels, you can, and should, explore your own feelings in depth before making your next move. If the love isn’t really there, you should not waste your time and energy, or that of your ex, trying to rekindle something that’s simply not there anymore.
Is the Relationship You Had Truly Worth Rehashing?
Most relationships have their shares of ups and downs. Successful relationships have far more ups in them than downs. Take a look back over the course of your entire relationship. How do the ups compare to the downs for you? Were the good times really good? How bad were the darkest days? Are you willing to experience them again if necessary?
How far are You Really Willing to Go to Make It Work?
You must be willing to do whatever it takes to make it work in most cases for that to happen. Your ex is likely to throw in a few pitfalls and tests along the way, if he or she is even willing to give it a go. Be prepared for them and ready to ace them with flying colors. Don’t even think about letting her see you sweat. But the willingness goes even deeper than passing a few tests. You must be willing to make a few vital changes for the sake of your relationship. But you won’t often find out what they are until the moment arrives. Just be prepared. Some of the changes may not be all that simple to make.
Most importantly, however, is your willingness to be the one to wait. This is often the most difficult, and most necessary, part of winning your lover back. Waiting for the right moment, though, makes all the difference in the world. I can help you understand when that moment is and help you come up with the ideal strategy to turn it into a prime opportunity.
Good Day all you good people todays article Getting The Attention You Deserve is about what we all need, especially from the one we love. We also should have some time on our own otherwise we will end up unhappy but it is important to agree with each other regarding this. You and your partner may not have the same need for such time and then you need some kind of agreement that both of you are happy with. And when you are together dont give your attention to your iphone or computer all the time because thats not going to build a sustainable relationship. I share the links to my other blogs under my picture of you are interested in more interesting reading;))
Ps. the article starts under the links!
Good Luck in Love and Life!
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In the beginning, all new relationships are in a “honeymoon period” where they can’t seem to get enough of each other. Both partners constantly want to be together and want to be with each other all the time. They talk, laugh, and make love all the time. This usually goes on for about the first 3 months or so of the relationship. Somewhere between the 4th and 6th months, the honeymoon period begins to cool down a bit. Now, it seems that there’s not that intense need to be together all the time anymore. In fact, it’s during this time that you may need to figure out how to get back some of the attention that you used to get from your partner.
Suddenly, you’re not only NOT at the top of his list but you may not even be in the top 5 of his list. There will be hanging out with his friends, gaming, sports, his family, and anything else that you may not have ever known he was totally into while you were going through the honeymoon phase. Now, you almost have to make an appointment with him to get to spend any time with him.
One thing you might try is getting tickets to a concert of his favorite band. In that way, you’ll not only grab his attention, but you’ll have fun, too. You COULD get him tickets to a sports event of his favorite team, but unless you’re also into that particular sport, you probably won’t have a lot of fun. He may even take those tickets and invite one of his buddies to go instead of you.
Plan a romantic evening where you cook a delicious dinner and light candles everywhere. Put on some sexy music, and try putting on something a bit sexy yourself. Just make sure that he understands that he CANNOT change these plans unless, of course, there’s a family illness or death. You have to make this clear because those inattentive men tend to also think nothing of changing plans with you at the last minute and leaving you hanging for the evening.
You can try greeting him at the door wearing nothing but stiletto heels and a smile. Many times that can get you some attention, but remember not to do it very often because you want it to be a surprise. Appearing at the door naked every day can kind of take the novelty away.
You can also try just sitting him down and letting him know that, while you certainly don’t mind that the 2 of you hang out separately with your own friends from time to time, that he still needs to spend time with you. If he can’t understand that, then maybe you just let him have ALL the time in the world he wants to spend with his buddies while you move on and find someone that wants to be with YOU. Some guys just don’t get it and will start to take you for granted pretty quickly. If it turns out that you’re in love with a teenager at heart, then you should probably keep looking until you find an adult.