Monthly Archives: June 2014

6 Strategic Moves You Need to Make to Get Her Back

All’s fair in love and war. Believe me, when love is on the skids, it certainly feels like war. We all know that the army with superior forces and sound strategies is the most certain of victors in any war. The same holds true when the war is for the heart of someone who has taken her heart back. These strategic moves are sure to improve your odds.

Dating

1) Give her space. It may sound counter-intuitive at the moment, but it’s important to give her a little breathing room to figure out what it is that she really wants. Give it to her.
2) Be absent from her life. She’ll never realize how much you mean to her or how much she misses having you around if you’re always there for her when she needs you. This is not the way to win her back. It’s rewarding her by giving her all the best of you without requiring the same from her in return. That’s not how successful relationships work.
3) Make her come to you. Don’t call, text, email, visit, etc. Don’t go to her. Instead, wait. Then, make her come to you. Let her be the one who sees that breaking up was a mistake. Let her figure out just how much she really does miss having you in her life. Let her come to you.
Get her back
Get her back
4) Don’t be overly eager. In fact, work very hard on your composure. Practice what you’ll say if you run into her. Work on the words, the phrases, and the overall message you want to send. Make sure she knows you’re doing just fine without her in your life.
5) Show the world you haven’t fallen apart. Women like strong men, no matter what they tell you. It may be that you have a girl who enjoys your sensitive side, but thousands of years of history show that women are attracted to men of strength, especially in times of adversity. Don’t fall apart. More importantly, don’t let the word spread if you do fall apart after the initial breakup.
6) Stop pretending to be someone you’re not in hopes of getting her back. Any ground you gain by pretending will be lost quickly once you begin dating again. You can’t pretend forever. She’ll eventually see through the exterior. If you want to make real, lasting changes, that’s great. Don’t pretend, however, that you’ve changed core things about yourself just for the sake of winning her back. It doesn’t serve either of you in the end and can set you back even further in your efforts to win her heart all over again.
Come up with a plan before you make your next move, if you haven’t made on already. If you’ve already made a few mistakes trying to get her back, take this time to step back and come up with a strategy before making your next move. Remember these strategies to help you get her back as well.

Dating

Silly Mistakes Derailing Your Efforts to Get Your Ex Back

How long have you been working to get your ex back without seeing any real results?

Many people in your shoes are surprised to learn that it isn’t what you aren’t doing that’s holding you back. It’s the things you are doing, that are working against you. Here are a few common roadblocks that could be derailing your trip back to relationship bliss.

You are Proud to be there for Your Ex

It’s a noble idea. Really it is. However, if you’re there for a friendly ear, a comforting shoulder, or a fast perk-me-up whenever your ex needs it from you, your ex isn’t really missing out on the benefits of being in a relationship with you. It’s getting all the fringe benefits of a loving relationship without putting in the work to keep things going. Instead, you’re going to have to let your ex deal with the stings life delivers sometimes without the solace of your comforting presence.

You Keep Trying

I know this one goes against everything your heart (and to some degree your head) is screaming at your right now. However, in times of crisis, reason isn’t even in charge of your head either. Reason rarely rules the heart. Why should a time of emotional distress be any different? One person can’t do it all in the relationship.
Your ex
Your ex
Pat Benatar had it right when she sang, “Love is a Battlefield.” Love is war and the winners, in love, have a plan. The tactical advantage goes to the one who retreats, assesses the situation impartially, and plans a strategic assault with victory in mind. You had better believe love is war. And you need to take a little time to assess your current position, the hostility of the terrain, and the best path to victory before you go in with guns (or in this case Cupid’s arrows) blazing.

You Attack from a Position of Weakness

Fans of NCIS know that team leader Gibbs is always telling his team not to apologize. According to Gibbs, apologizing is a sign of weakness. While that’s a philosophical debate for the most part, when you’re trying to save your relationship or get your ex back, it is often viewed, the leaving party, as a sign of weakness. You don’t want to make your move from an inferior position. Instead, lead with your strengths.
Show your power. Establish your dominance. Come in swinging from a position of strength and don’t ever let your ex see you sweat. There’s nothing sexier, to members of the opposite sex, than confidence. Be confident in yourself, your contribution to the relationship, and the fact that it’s just not time for this relationship to end.
Above all else, don’t make a move until you know what you’re going to do next. Have a contingency plan in place for a favorable outcome as well as a less-than-favorable outcome so that you don’t come across as desperate if you don’t win this round. Your mind needs to remain focused on the long-term prize of getting your ex back and every plan needs to ultimately lead you down that happy road.

The Secret you need to know to get your ex back! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!

Why Do Women Leave Marriages?

If you look at the statistics about divorce, they are often quite shocking. According to the Huffington Post, women are 2/3 more likely to ask for a divorce than men are. The real question though, is why are women more likely to walk away from a marriage than men are? The opinions on this vary greatly. However, these are a few of the most common reasons women ultimately ask for divorce.

Broken Marriage Reasons: Cheating Husbands

A man who is cheating on his wife, doesn’t necessarily want out of the marriage. If he can have his cake and eat it on the side, he’s not inclined to rock the boat. If the shoe is on the other foot, however, and the husband finds out his wife is cheating, the story is a little different, though many men don’t consider cheating to be quite the same betrayal the average woman does. Of course, not all marriages where the husband cheats end in divorce. It is, though, really difficult for women to move past, even if they initially try to work things out after the cheating occurs.

Broken Marriage Reasons: Money Matters

Money, in the Bible, is called the root of all evil. Whether or not you agree with that particular assessment, it is the number one cause of divorce and breakups worldwide. Women want security in their marriages. That includes financial security. It’s not always a matter of men not making enough money, but may very directly be related to how you spend and/or save money.
Marriage
Marriage

Broken Marriage Reasons: Needs Not Met at Home

This is the primary reason women cheat and one of the big contributing factors to a woman seeking divorce. It’s also more than a little unfair to the man because women are often not likely to tell you what those needs are so that you do have a chance to meet them. It’s difficult for women, who are generally more intuitive than men are. She thinks you should somehow know what those needs are and is upset, and often hurt, that you aren’t meeting them. The trick here is to find out what her needs are. Ask her if you must, and make sure you’re meeting them at every opportunity to do so.

Broken Marriage Reasons: Reality doesn’t Live up to Expectation

Men have a hard road job here. Before marriage, you work hard to woo your wife. You’re always doing little things in an effort to get her attention and make her your wife. Once she’s your wife, you often stop aiming to please in many ways. She’s grown to expect those things from you and you’ve stopped delivering. It’s the same level of disappointment you feel when she stops working so hard to stroke your ego. Real life often comes in and kicks all expectations of what married life will be like in the teeth.
Understanding why women leave can help you take the steps now to prevent your wife from asking for a divorce. Now is the time to take action so you can avoid the painful process of divorce and the risk of losing so much more than the woman you love.

Five First-Date Friendly Venues – For the Second Time Around

When you’re getting back together with your ex there’s a fine line that you must walk between doing things the old way and making a fresh start together. Sometimes it’s best to part with the old completely and go for something completely new and different. Something you’ve never done together before. If you’ve already tried some of these things, skip those in favor of making new memories together and avoiding possible stigmas or negative emotions tied to things you’ve tried in the past.

Dating

Date Friendly Venues -1) Roller-skating or ice-skating.

Both activities are physical activities that can be a lot of fun, at any age, provided you both come into it with open minds and expecting to have a good time together. More importantly, it gives you the opportunity to hold hands, to talk, and to rediscover that “sense of fun” that flows out of relationships when times are tough.

Date Friendly Venues -2) Rodeo.

Depending on where you are in the world, rodeos offer a chance to cheer for the underdog, to laugh at the antics of the clowns, and the rush of adrenaline that almost always accompanies danger or risk. All from the relative safety of bleacher seats. Besides, what girl doesn’t love ponies?
Date
Date

Date Friendly Venues -3) Hot air balloon ride.

Few options available to you are more romantic than a hot air balloon ride. It’s a great way to literally get above it all and see how small your problems really are from a bird’s-eye view.

Date Friendly Venues -4) Sailing, canoeing, or white water rafting.

Unless you live in a desert climate, the odds are good that there is some venue for one of these activities nearby. Water can be romantic and fun. The time you spend together doing this is time you’re not likely to forget. It’s a great opportunity to spend time together, talk, or simple enjoy the ride — and the company.

Date Friendly Venues -5) Minor league sporting event.

Skip the high price tag and huge crowds of the average major league sporting venue. Attending a minor league sporting event allows you both to cheer for the home team without breaking the bank. More importantly, the smaller crowds give you time to talk to each other a little before, during, and after the game. You get the benefit of watching favorite sports, such as hockey, baseball, football, and even soccer, without the downside of big league games.
Great dates don’t just happen. They’re made. It takes more than a great location though to make your first date – the second time around – truly stand out from the crowd. These venues are a great start, but it’s up to you to really make this date sparkle and shine. Be on your best behavior. Treat your date well. Avoid danger zones or hot topics. And remember to have fun and remind your ex why he or she fell in love with you in the first place.

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Three Ways to Save Your Marriage

Getting his attention was once an easy thing to do. In the early days of your marriage, you seemed to have it all the time.

There were even times when you secretly wished you could have a little less of it. Lately, however, things have changed and he seems more content to work in the garage, absorb himself in video games, or assume his position as king of the Lazy-boy with remote in hand than to pay attention to you. What went wrong? And, what can you do to get his attention all over again?
The good news for you, is that all relationships have their ups and downs. It’s a normal cycle. The better news, is that it’s not beyond your control to take the upper hand and make sure you have his attention now, and any other time when other issues seem to be horning in on your time with your husband.
1) Feed him. Debi Gutierrez is a very funny comedian who understands the male psyche pretty well. She believes there are only two things you can do to really get his attention and make him happy. Feeding him is one of those things. It doesn’t take much imagination to come up with the other. The thing is, it isn’t all about whether or not you offer him food. It’s about the kind of food you offer him. Men are lusty creatures. It shows in their appetite for you as well as their appetite for food. You can’t feed him the things that leave you feeling deprived for dinner and expect him to be happy with the results. Give him real food made for his appetites and see what a difference it makes in the attention he pays you.
marriage
Marriage
2) Compliment him. Pay him a compliment. Tell him how much the little things he does really mean to you. Let him know that you appreciate the way he takes care of you and your family. Tell him how much he means to you. Women are often credited with being the sentimental ones in relationships. You often forget that men need to hear these words of affirmation and appreciation just as much as you need to hear them. Not only does this set an amazing example for him to follow but it also lets him know how you really feel about the things he does for you and for your marriage.
3) Make yourself available to him. While we do not live in the day and age of wives submitting to their husbands in the literal sense, there is still something that touches a man above and beyond all else for you to make the first move. For you to be the one offering him what he wants from you. Make the first move. If it doesn’t get his attention at first, make your offer a little bolder. Most men do not need to be asked twice though.
Getting his attention is the easy part. Keeping it, despite all the distractions that impact relationships today is where the road gets a little rockier. Remember these tips whenever his attention starts to stray again and you’re sure to keep your marriage on the right path now and down the road.
 

Together, through the Save The Marriage System , we can save your marriage!

 

Save The Marriage will give you an understanding of what happened to your marriage, how to save it, and how to start creating the marriage of your dreams.

You will benefit from my, nearly, twenty years of working with clients, in person, and literally, thousands of couples in various settings.

Don’t expect hundreds of pages that just reiterate what everyone else has already said.

Instead, I have made the ideas and information readable and easily understood. No “psycho -babble” here, just the facts, ideas, and actions you need to save your marriage. I will tell you what went wrong, what to do to change it, and how to do it.

Starting tonight. . . in fact, in the next 10 minutes, you can start saving your marriage and moving toward the marriage relationship you always dreamed about.

Can you imagine how wonderful it feel to, finally, eliminate the fear, anxiety and stress that currently envelopes you. . . and replace it with feelings of love, joy and contentment?

You don’t have to imagine it. . . because, with the secrets and strategies you will find with the Save The Marriage System, you will be solidly on the path from marital frustration to marital bliss!


Don’t take my word for it…

A small sample of what others have said about this system…

 

What Others Are Saying:
(Just a few of the hundreds of notes
provided to us, all telling us the same
thing, that while individual results vary,
This Material Works!)“A terrific resource…”“I have been reading the first few sections and am very relieved to find such a terrific resource……It really fits with the direction I’ve been taking, personally and with clients.”

  • -Sally F., Therapist
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  • “I am amazed…a whole new outlook…”

    “I sat and read your modules last night. I read from about 7pm to 12am. I am amazed! After reading, I have a whole new outlook on our marriage. After reading, I am prepared to make the necessary changes and shifts in order to have the marriage I’ve always wanted.”
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  • “Wow…convinced in the very first chapter…”
  • “I recently purchased your package, Save The Marriage, and spent the last week reading it. I don’t know how to express how I feel about it other than to just say, “Wow!”……I was convinced within the very first section as I could see the truth of it in my own life and relationship…”
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    “For the record… let me just say that your guide is the most sensible, real, self help book of any kind that I have ever read…
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  • “He actually left…”
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(Actual customer comments. NOTE: Results may vary.)

READ MORE COMMENTS BY CLICKING HERE

How Can I Make Her Love Me Again?

Believe it or not, most women don’t leave their men because they’ve stopped loving them. They don’t pull away because you’re not attractive to her anymore. Most of the time, it’s not usually anything you’ve done that’s pushed her away. Believe it or not, there’s an old country song that has it right – for the most part. It’s not what you did. It’s all those things you didn’t do.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying it’s all your fault!

I’m a firm believer that it takes two to tango. She never spoke up and told you what she needed from you. But, really, how often do you tell her what you need her to do for you?

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While the song may be a few decades old by now, there is wisdom in those old lyrics. If you’re trying to make your relationship work and put a little bit of the love back in it, then you need to remember all the things he forgot.

Tell Her You Love Her

Don’t take it for granted that she knows. Tell her. Show her. Shout it out from the rooftops, but make sure she knows, without a doubt, that you only have eyes for her.
Her eyes
Her eyes

Listen to What She has to Say

This one is hard. Men and women often live in different worlds when it comes to language. She starts talking and sometimes your eyes just glaze over with this faraway look. She notices this and it hurts. You’re going to have to really listen, like the man in the Klondike commercial. It will impress her and make her feel like she really is important to you.

Make Time for Her

But don’t make her feel like it’s a sacrifice. You really should want to do things together once in a great while. Weekly date nights are a small thing, but when done right, they can mean so much for the romance and love in your relationship. It’s one night a week that lets her know she’s still the woman you love.

Let Her Know She Still Rocks Your World

Tell her how beautiful she is. No matter how many times she dismisses it, she secretly loves to hear you say it. She wants to know that she still turns you on and that you’re not turning to her because she’s available. She wants to know that your fires are still burning bright for her just as much as you want to know that she still digs you too.
You don’t have to go to charm school. You don’t have to step outside of your league, get a second job, or lose 100 pounds to get her to love you again. All you really need to do is let her know that you’re still the man she fell for so long ago.

The Secret you need to know to forgive and get your love back! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!

Is It Really My Fault He Cheat?

If you’ve watched the news lately you’ve probably noticed that there’s been quite a stir over who is at fault when men cheat.

A prominent televangelist has suggested that part of the responsibility should be placed on the shoulder of the woman for not making the effort to overcome genetic predispositions.
While the “men are dogs” argument doesn’t fly in all corners of the Web-o-verse, it’s probably a good idea to sit back and speculate over whether there could be some truth in the idea.

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Now, I’m not advocating that men cheat or that women blindly forgive men who cheat. I’m not even saying that it’s a woman’s fault her man cheats. I am not even saying that the most diligent efforts by women will prevent cheating completely.
I can definitely say that doing these two things will definitely help keep his attention focused firmly on you and make other woman almost invisible to him. Want to know what they are?
Get His Engine Running
Slip a reason for him to come home at night into his briefcase or lunchbox each day as he sets off for work. Whether it’s a snapshot, a steamy love note, or just a code word you make up together, give him a reason to come racing home after he punches out at work for the day.
And then?
Live up to the promise you made in the morning. No matter how many things happen during your day to drag you down, you MUST make good on that promise so that he’ll know what he’s likely to get each and every time you drop one of your lunchbox/briefcase hints.
Show Him Your Adoration
Among men who cheat, the overwhelming reason why has nothing to do with the physical appearance of the other woman. In fact, most men who cheat have said they do not find the other woman more attractive than their wives. She’s not thinner, leggier, bustier, and she doesn’t have a bigger butt (sorry Mix-A-Lot).
Cheat
Cheat
It’s not about looks at all. The real reason men cheat on their wives, and can’t really help themselves, despite the risks it involves has to do with one thing. She makes him feel adored, flattered, admired, and respected. She doesn’t roll her eyes at his corny jokes. She clings to his arms and laughs. She makes the first move. She shows interest. She goes after him and makes him feel like THE MAN. And THAT is his Kryptonite.
How do you beat this?
It may seem like a tall order, but if you work really hard and think back to the early days when you dated, you should remember all the things you used to tell him that you don’t tell him today. You brought out the best in him by showing him that you believed he was the best and he wants that feeling back. He’s trying to recapture that when he cheats. Give him that feeling at home – and give it to him often – and he’ll never have a single reason to stray.
These two things don’t require six spinning classes a day. They don’t require a second job. And, they don’t involve major personality changes. Most of these things are the sorts of things you did when you were first together and in love. Put them to work today and never worry about a cheating husband again. Is it your fault he cheated? No, but you CAN make a difference going forward.

The Secret you need to know to get your lover back! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again after a breakup! 

Why Doesn’t He Love Me Anymore?

The feeling of falling out of love isn’t a pleasant one by any stretch of the imagination — especially when you’re on the receiving end. You’re left to wonder what went wrong, whether it was your fault, and if there’s anything you can do to change things. The good news for you is that most people don’t simply turn love on and off like a light switch. It takes time to fall in love — and to fall out of it. That means he probably isn’t quite there yet. And a little bit of love is all you need as a foundation upon which you can build a once in a lifetime kind of love.
But, knowing that doesn’t fix the problem in your relationship. What you need is a plan of action that’s sure to SOLVE the problem.

Ex Factor Banner #2

Your immediate problem is that he isn’t FEELING the love right now. The solution is simple. You need to make him feel the love again. Of course, from where you sit, reading this, it doesn’t seem all that simple. Consider making these moves to see what a difference they make in how he feels about you.

1) Start Dressing to Impress

While the best relationships aren’t based on looks alone, it never hurts for your man to see you making an effort to look good for him. Wear the clothes he likes to see you wearing, fix up your hair, apply a few strategic cosmetics, etc. You may even consider professional waxing services.
He
He
These moves won’t necessarily have him feeling the love for you again, but they will certainly get his attention. Once you have his attention, it’s time to make your next move.

2) Change the Way YOU Show Your Love for Him

Men and women express love and feel loved in different ways. While stereotypes aren’t always helpful, it does help to understand that there are fundamental differences. Men feel and show love through physical acts. Not all of them are sexual. Sometimes, it’s little things like making sure the oil is changed in your car or mowing the lawn week after week. At other times it is more personal, such as a protective hand on your back in public, a steadying arm as you climb steps together, or intimate acts that are the ultimate expression of love for the average man.
Women express love differently. The expressions are often verbal or service oriented. Taking care of the household, preparing meals, and other domestic tasks are prime examples. Women are also much more likely to use words to express your love. If you want him to feel love you must watch the words you use at all times. Words that criticize, confront, or disrespect tear down the love he’s building while words that edify, respect, and show deep admiration and loyalty build up the love. Physical acts, such as touching and other acts of service are also excellent choices because they show him YOUR love in HIS language.
Keep these things in mind and you’ll never need to ask, “Why doesn’t he love me anymore?” again. He’ll be feeling the love and showing you more than a little love in return.

The Secret you need to know to get your lover back! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again after a breakup! 

Reigniting the Romance – How to Make Her Fall in Love With You Again

How to Make Her Fall in Love With You Again

How often do you wish you could simply turn back the clock and start over with your love? The desire to do so is more prevalent and commonplace than you probably realize. Fortunately, you don’t need a time machine, magic carpet, or handy dandy neuralyzer, like the one Tommy Lee Jones used to erase memories in the movie Men in Black, to help your girl fall in love with you all over again. Here are a few tactics you do need to keep in mind, though, if you want your efforts to be successful.

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In love tips: Make it all About Her

Now is the time to put your idea of romance on the shelf. When you’re working to win her back, you need to go back to the basics and make a concentrated effort to literally sweep her off her feet and back into your arms. Revisit your first date. Even if the exact location isn’t feasible for the two of you now (distance, time, no longer in business, etc.) try to create a date that gives a nod back to your first days together. It will leave her thinking about happier times and have you both remembering the endearing qualities about each other that made you fall in love in the first place.
In love
In love

In love tips: Make Her Laugh

After a while, relationships become so serious. We seem to take all the fun out of them. Most women have stated, more than once, that their man’s sense of humor was what attracted her to him in the first place. The Levi’s or Wrangler’s, depending on where you’re from, ran a close second. The big point to take away from all this is that laughter is the way to her heart more often than not. If your goal is to win her back, then making her laugh is a great place to begin.

In love tips: Romance her Between the Ears

Chocolates, flowers, and romantic gestures are all well and good. If you want to set her heart aflutter, however, you’re going to have to touch the space between her ears. Yes, it’s the brain. It’s a scary proposition for many guys, but today’s woman is bright, savvy, and one tough cookie. Reaching out and touching her heart will only get her attention briefly. If you want to hold onto that attention, you’re going to have to give her something to wrap her mind around.
It may seem a little hard to do at first, but once you begin practicing these pathways to success, you’re sure to find a much better success rating for your efforts to win her back.

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Are You Making These Disastrous Date Night Mistakes?

Date night can be a highly effective tool for putting a little love back into your relationship. Whether you’re going through a bit of a seven-year-itch or on the verge of calling it quits, making the right date night choices can be a huge win for your marriage. Unfortunately, making date night mistakes of monumental proportions, such as those listed below, can spell disaster for your efforts to save your relationship.

Spending the Entire Night Discussing Family Problems

Date night is all about getting away from the mundane issues troubling the two of you. It’s time to turn your focus on each other. Leave the kids, parents, in-laws, and outlaws at home where they belong. You want this to be a genuine “feel good” opportunity. Don’t squander it by bringing bad vibes into the evening.

Bringing Work Along on Your Date

Whether it is in thoughts or in deeds, bringing work on your date night date not only kills the mood, but also breeds resentment. In many marriages, constant work is a problem. Your spouse feels slighted because you always seem to put work before family. When you bring work on your date night that resentment becomes a deep and simmering rage. It’s just another nail in the coffin of your relationship in many ways and one that can be easily avoided one night a week.

Cancelling Date Night or Rearranging it at the Last Minute

Cancelling date nights is a huge no-no. It’s the last thing you want to do without a darned good (I mean someone has died or is about to die kind of) reason. Whenever you cancel date night, you’re essentially putting whatever reason it was before your marriage. Stuff happens. Sitters quit or cancel and you’re left scrambling to find a suitable alternative. It’s better to do a little additional scrambling than to deal with the romantic and relationship fallout of a cancellation.
date
Date
The same holds true with rearranging plans at the last minute. Once the sitter is lined up and dinner plans are set for the evening, last-minute rearrangements really upset the apple cart doing more harm for the date night cause than good. The bottom line is that if you aren’t going to take date night seriously, it’s better nto to plan to have it at all.

Falling into a Date Night Rut

Whatever you do, don’t do the same thing week after week. It becomes monotonous and routine. This is your opportunity to add a little fun and excitement to your relationship. Don’t risk it by going to dinner and a movie week after week. Switch it up some and see what a difference it makes not only in your excitement about having a date night but also in your partner’s response to date night. Make a date night “bucket list” of things you’d like to do on date night together and have fun granting each other’s date night wishes.
Date night can be as exciting or as humdrum as you allow it to be. Make a compact with yourself and one another not to let your date night become a run of the mill experience that’s easily taken for granted. Do this and your marriage is sure to be one in which you do not take each other for granted either.